


For Lack Of Better Words

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2000-09-22
Updated: 2000-09-22
Packaged: 2019-05-15 02:46:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 4,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14782187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: The President receives a very interesting memo.





	1. For Lack Of Better Words

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

For Lack of Better Words 

by: Rhiannon & AJ 

disclaimer: We'll give the pretty toys back... we promise...

***Okay, this is a NEW story, completely independent of our trilogy... We came up with it tonight and just couldn't wait to share it with everyone!!!!***

 

President Jed Bartlet sat in the Oval Office, wadding through the mountains of paper work that had piled up on his desk. Most of this was stuff he had put off until the last moment... and now it was biting him in his butt.

It was like his mother always told him, procrastination was not his friend... But it did make for a nice acquaintance sometimes.

"Sir, you busy?"

Jed looked up to see Leo sticking his head through the open doorway, "Just thinking of various ways to poke my eyes out instead of finishing this crap."

Leo walked further into the room, "You haven't finished that yet?"

"No, I haven't finished that yet." Jed mimicked his friend. "Does it look like I've finished it yet?"

"It looks like you're being a smartass to me sir," Leo replied.

"That was said with all due respect to the big seal on my carpet, I would assume."

"Of course, sir." Leo replied with innocent eyes. "And, if you don't mind me saying so-"

"And I do."

"You should have learned by now that procrastination is not your friend." Leo finished as if he had never been interrupted.

"You have spent entirely too much time around my mother, you know that?" Jed looked at him with mock irritation.

"Whatever."

"Did you have a point to this visit? Or was the purpose of it solely to be a pain in my butt?"

"A little of both, actually." Leo replied. "Actually I-"

Mrs. Landingham chose that moment to walk into the Oval Office, "Mr. President?"

"Yes, Mrs. Landingham?"

"I have a note here..." Mrs. Landingham paused for a moment. She had seen and heard a lot of things in her years at the White House... but this took the cake. "And you're going to want to read it now."

"Fine," Jed replied, holding out his hand.

Mrs. Landingham handed him the note and then hurried back to the doorway, where she hovered with Charlie. Leo stood in his spot, waiting to see if the note was going to cause him more work.

The trio watched as Jed's face did an eclectic dance of expression. First of interest... then of incredulousness... then shock... the dismay... and then anger, "I'm going to kill her."

Leo glanced back at Charlie and Mrs. Landingham and then back at his President, "Sir?"

"I'm really going to kill her." Jed repeated, still staring at the note.

"Sir?"

Jed looked over at Leo and then back at the note, "Would you care to hear this little quote, Leo?"

"Please."

"You're country's current policy towards children literacy is completely inept. It is dated back in the dark ages. No wonder you guys are too stupid to fix the problem, you probably can't read what it is!" Jed read from the slip of paper.

"What country was this said about?" Leo asked.

"Switzerland." Jed replied.

"And... who said this?"

Jed tilted his head to the side, "My wife, Leo."

  


	2. For Lack Of Better Words 2

For Lack of Better Words 

by Rhiannon and AJ 

A.K.A. The Diabolically Machivellian Sisters

 

Quietly entering Abbey's office, Jed went straight over to the couch, and sat down. Holding a copy of the transcripts of the meeting that took place no less than an hour ago. The same copy that was already in the hands of all of the White House reporters...

After getting absolutely no where with Abbey, remaining as silent as he was, Jed decided to smack the paper against the arm of the chair, over and over again.

Having been successful in drawing Abbey's attention, but not her voice, Jed raised a hand to his mouth and cleared his throat.

"Fine! I give in." Abbey said. "What?"

"Oh, I think you know what, Abigail." Jed adopted a tone.

"Jed, are you going to tell me? Cause if not..."

Jed stood up and walked over to her desk. Once there, he threw the papers down on her desk. "That's what the hell I'm talking about!" Jed shouted.

"Don't raise your voice to me, Josiah!" Abbey shouted right back, as she picked up the scattered papers on her desk and began to read them, just long enough to figure out what they were.

"What the hell were you doing saying that stuff, Abbey?"

Looking up at Jed, Abbey elected to keep quiet and quickly exit the room, before she blew her roof... Leaving Jed standing in the middle of her office staring out the door.

After a brief moment, Jed finally began to move his feet. One in front of the other, until they were at a fast pace, and headed towards Abbey. Coming up behind her in the middle of the foyer right near the press briefing room, Jed managed to grab her by the arm.

"Abbey, don't..."

"Jed! You don't. You know damn well that what I said was right. I don't give a rat's ass if it causes you problems. I was right, and I will not apologize for it."

"Abbey!" Jed's voice echoed through the halls filled with reporters with audio and video equipment.

"Jed, I will not apologize!" Was Abbey's final word as she paraded away from him.

"Damn her!" Jed exclaimed as he maintained his look of extreme discontent, as Toby came approaching him at a fast pace.


	3. For Lack Of Better Words 3

For Lack of Better Words 

by Rhiannon and AJ 

A.K.A. The Diabolically Machivellian Sisters

 

Toby touched Jed's arm, "Mr. President?"

"What?" Jed snapped, his mind still on his wife.

"This is probably not the best spot in the world to have a loud discussion with your wife over a rather heated topic," Toby replied.

"What?" Jed asked. Then he realized where he was, "Oh, damn."

"Indeed, sir." Toby responded.

"Dammit to hell." Jed muttered as he strode quickly back to the safety of the Oval Office, "I'm going to kill that woman." 

~~~ 

Once Jed walked back into the Oval Office he was assaulted by a clearly upset Chief of Staff and Press Secretary.

"What was that, sir?" Leo demanded. "Have you lost your mind?"

"Sir, you cannot engage in that kind of an argument with Mrs. Bartlet in front of the press like that." CJ added, in a somewhat calmer voice than Leo McGarry's. "Sir, the press is going to have a field day with the transcript of Mrs. Bartlet's meeting and with the sound bytes and footage of that fight."

"Not to mention that it was stupid!" Josh added, walking into the room with Sam.

"Okay, fine." Jed raised his voice. "It was stupid... I think we've established that. Now can we move on... Like to how we fix this."

"You have to have the First Lady apologize," CJ replied immediately.

"CJ-" Jed sighed.

"CJ's right, sir." Toby added. "Mrs. Bartlet must apologize for her comments"

Jed turned to Toby, "You wanna go tell her that?"

"Um... no, sir." Toby replied. "I don't... But, then... I'm not married to her and I don't have to."

"She's got to do it publicly to, sir." Leo added, having gotten his blood pressure back down to a normal level.

"Oh, for crying out loud Leo." Jed exclaimed.

"Leo's right Mr. President." Josh said. He looked over at Sam, clearly informing him to speak.

"They're right, sir." Sam finally spoke up.

"Okay, fine..." Jed let out a sigh. "I'll go tell her... If I'm killed doing this, I just want you all to know that I blame you."

"We'll shoulder that blame, Mr. President." Leo responded.

Jed shook his head as he walked out the door, "Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn, and damn again... I'm gonna kill that woman."


	4. For Lack Of Better Words 4

For Lack of Better Words 

by Rhiannon and AJ 

A.K.A. The Diabolically Machivellian Sisters

 

Popping his head into his wife's office, Jed found it empty. Not really sure if this was a good thing, or not, Jed turned around and began to walk away. As he was halfway down the hall, he heard his wife talking to her secretary behind him.

Turning around once again, Jed found Abbey, with her back towards Jed. Using this to his advantage, Jed quietly snuck up behind his wife, having a finger placed over his lips, to keep her secretary quiet.

Picking Abbey up, with one very swift move, Jed carried her into her office and shut and locked the door.

"If you want to live to take another breath, you will put me down right now, Josiah Thomas Bartlet!" Abbey shouted.

Conceding to her demands, Jed carefully put Abbey down, on to her feet. Immediately, Abbey tried to take off for the door and get out of her office. She was still very pissed at him, and this just made things worse. Not wanting a huge fight, when they both knew that she was right, Abbey knew that she just had to get out of there...

Why didn't Jed know that?...

Blocking the doorway with his body, Jed said, "No! You aren't going anywhere. Not until we talk." Jed took his wife, and spinned her until her back was facing him. Marching her over to the couch, he sat her down. "Abbey..."

"I won't publicly apologize. I refuse to do it, Jed. I'm right, you know it, they know it."

"Abbey..."

"Jed, you can't ask me to do this. It would be compromising everything I have stood for in the past few months."

"Abbey..."

"Will you please expand your vocabulary, Jed?"

"Abigail..."

"That's not what I meant."

"Tell you what, you do this for me, and I'll do something nice for you and one of your causes."

"Such as?" Abbey asked as she rested her head into his chest, forgetting all about how she was so thoroughly pissed at him just minutes ago.

"You name it, you got it." Jed smiled as he planted a kiss on top of her head.

"Even child labor?"

"Abbey..."

"You said anything. I choose child labor." Abbey said as she turned around and began to kiss him passionately, denying him the chance of speech.


	5. For Lack Of Better Words 5

For Lack of Better Words 

by Rhiannon and AJ 

A.K.A. The Diabolically Machivellian Sisters

 

Jed sank back into the couch as Abbey pressed against him. He wrapped his arms around her as they continued to kiss.

Finally, Abbey pulled away. She leaned her head against his chest, "Jed?"

"Hmm?"

"Child labor."

Jed groaned, "Abbey..."

Abbey raised her head and began leaving a trail of tiny kisses along his jaw and down his throat, "Please? You promised I could have anything I wanted if I apologized..."

"Abbey, I-"

"What?" Abbey responded as she slowly began to undo his tie.

"Abbey..."

"Hmm?" She muttered as she began to unbutton his shirt.

Jed struggled to keep his breathing even, "You know that everyone saw us fighting earlier? It's going to be on the news tonight."

"That's true," Abbey replied as she wrapped her legs around his body. "But, we're not fighting now, are we?"

"No, we're not fighting now," he responded. "But Abbey-"

He was silenced when Abbey leaned over and captured his mouth with her own. Abbey snaked her arm behind his back and raked her fingers through his hair. After a long moment, Abbey released his lips, "Jed?"

"What?" came her husband's hoarse reply.

"I apologize and..."

"Yes?" he muttered as Abbey ran her hands down his chest.

"And you give me..." Abbey said as she began a new trail of kisses along his jaw. "Child labor... yes?"

"Okay," Jed breathed.

"Good!" Abbey exclaimed, jumping off the couch. "You can go back to work now." She hid her grin from her husband by turning her back to him.

Jed sat there for a moment; She'd done it again. He shook his head, "No, uh- uh. You're not getting out of this that easy young lady! Not after I got called stupid in my own office!" He vaulted off the couch.

"Who's problem is that?" Abbey retorted, fighting to keep from laughing.

"It's about to be yours!" Jed answered as he picked her up off the ground. "Let's go."

"Jed put me down!" Abbey yelped.

"I fully intend to, once we get to our destination!" Jed replied as he walked out of her office and down the hallway.

"And, just where might that be?" Abbey questioned.

Jed looked her in the eye, "After that performance, you really need to ask me that question?"


	6. For Lack Of Better Words 6

For Lack of Better Words 

by Rhiannon and AJ 

A.K.A. The Diabolically Machivellian Sisters

 

"Good morning, sir." Leo chimed as he walked into the Oval Office.

"Leo." Jed acknowledged.

"I saw Abbey's apology last night."

"Did you?" Jed wasn't paying much attention to his friend, as he was trying to get through some of the papers on his desk before the rest of the staff showed up.

"Yes, I did. And I'm curious... How in the world did you get her to apologize, so soon?"

"I..." Jed looked up at his Chief of Staff. "I had to promise her something."

"What might that be, sir?" Leo prodded, already knowing the answer.

Picking up on Leo's tone of voice, Jed defended himself, "It was the only way, Leo. It was either that, or..."

"Or what, sir?" Leo's voice was brimming with curiosity.

"Leo... I got her to apologize, didn't I?"

"Only by making it worse for us. Good thing no one knows, yet, what you promised."

"And you called me whooped?" Toby said in a dubious tone, as he marched into the Oval Office.

"Toby!" Jed proclaimed, as he really didn't want a repeat episode of yesterday.

"You called me whooped, when I gave in on mandatory minimum's. You called me whooped, sir. If that isn't calling the kettle black..."

"How'd you find out?" Jed asked with a troubled expression.

"Oh, it's all over, sir. CJ's trying to find out how... but it's all over. This is big news... The President and child labor. Especially considering the very animate position that the First Lady holds when it comes to this issue. And what, with the fact that EVERYONE knows that she persuaded you into doing this..."

"When did we decide to do child labor?" Josh asked as he and Sam entered the Oval Office, interrupting Toby's roar.

"I'll tell you what, all of you." Jed said. "If you can figure out a way that I could have used to get my wife to apologize, without doing child labor, please share it with me. Cause I'm sure this isn't an isolated issue, not when it comes to her." Jed got up from his desk, and walked around to the other side of it, leaning into it. "I seriously doubt that any of you will be able to figure out any such method, but if you want to try... So, in the mean time, I want you to figure out a way that we can do this, without doing it. And what I mean by that... If I end up getting in trouble, from any side, none of you will like it, I can tell you that for damn sure."


	7. For Lack Of Better Words 7

For Lack of Better Words 

by Rhiannon and AJ 

A.K.A. The Diabolically Machivellian Sisters

 

Jed looked at his staff. They had finally created the perfect platform... well it was as perfect as they could make it, "And you all agree on this?"

"Absolutely, sir." CJ responded first. "This the best way for you to keep out of child labor and still keep your promise to the First Lady... sorta."

"Sorta?" Jed repeated. "That's the part I'm not too keen on myself."

"It will definitely keep you out of child labor, Mr. President." Toby spoke up. "As for Mrs. Bartlet..."

"How fast can you tap dance?" Josh chimed in.

Jed simply glared at the young man. Josh opened his eyes in an attempt to paint an innocent expression on his face... a rather vain attempt.

"Sir," Leo said, pulling his friend's attention away from Josh. "We can't get involved in child labor... you know that. But you promised Mrs. Bartlet, this is the best way to do both without pissing too many people off."

"Yeah, I know." Jed sighed. "Okay, let's do it."

Jed waited for his staff to leave the Oval Office. He turned and saw Leo looking at him with raised eyebrows, "What?"

"Nothing, sir."

"Yeah, right." Jed said. "What?"

"I'm just trying to get a mental picture of you and this room before Abbey comes in here." Leo responded.

Jed shook his head, "What are the chances of me sleeping in my own bedroom tonight, Leo?"

"Pretty damn bad, sir." Leo responded. "I'd plan on bunking in a guest bedroom tonight..."

"Funny, Leo."

"Hey, I'm not the one who promised my wife something I couldn't do." Leo responded. "Which reminds me, how did Abbey get you to agree to child labor?"

Jed looked over at him with a raised eyebrow.

"That's what I thought." Leo said as he walked to the door that led to his own office.

"What, you're not staying for the fireworks?" Jed called after him.

"Are you kidding me?" Leo shot back. "Abbey's not mad at me and I'd like to keep it that way."

"Thanks a lot."

"Don't mention it!" 

~~~ 

Three hours later, the door to the Oval Office swung open and slammed into the wall behind it.

Jed looked up from his desk and found Hurricane Abbey standing in his doorway. He groaned, knowing precisely what was to come next...

"What did you do?!" Abbey thundered, slamming the door behind her as she walked all the way into the Oval Office.


	8. For Lack Of Better Words 8

For Lack of Better Words 

by Rhiannon and AJ 

A.K.A. The Diabolically Machivellian Sisters

 

"I-" Jed stumbled. "I have a meeting to go to." He said as he rose to his feet.

"Sit the hell down! You have no meetings!"

"Abbey-"

"And shut the hell up too!" Abbey crossed the room, so she was right in front of his desk. "You lied to me. You made me a promise, and you stabbed me in the back!!!"

"Abbey-"

"Didn't I tell you to shut the hell up?!!" Jed immediately sank back down into his chair, wanting to crawl under his desk. "I apologized, damnit! I didn't want to. And I definitely hurt myself for doing so. But I did it. What the hell gives you the right to back out?!"

Jed stared at his wife, tongue clamped down.

"Well?!!" Abbey insisted.

"You told me to 'shut the hell up' and now you want me to talk?" Jed said sarcastically.

"Jed!" Abbey shouted. "Don't you play games with me. I went out and publicly said I was sorry for my behavior and words towards those Switzerland idiots. YOU! You, somehow capitalized on this! Now, explain to me why that is so."

"You're sexy when you're mad." Jed responded, and immediately regretted it, due to the very furried look stewing on Abbey's face. "And that look tells me that I should have a guest room set up for me."

"Well, well, well. Look who finally decided to use his brain."

"I'm sorry." Jed stood up and went over to Abbey. "I had no control over any of this. It was all Josh's idea."

"Don't pass the blame on to Josh. You know, as well as I do, that Josh was only doing what YOU told him to do!"

"Abbey-"

"Save it, Jed." Abbey yelled. "And don't worry about readying a guest room, because until you fix this, I will not be staying here with you." Abbey stormed out of the office.


	9. For Lack Of Better Words 9

For Lack of Better Words 

by Rhiannon and AJ 

A.K.A. The Diabolically Machivellian Sisters

 

Jed watched as she walked out the door... No, walked wasn't the right word of it... stormed out was a more fitting term. He let out a breath, he couldn't let her leave mad.

He strode towards the door, but was immediately met by Mrs. Landingham, "Mr. President, you have three meetings in the next three hours... The first one is with-"

"Mrs. Landingham, I really don't give a damn. I have to-"

"You have to have to attend these meetings, sir." Mrs. Landingham finished for him. "They cannot be put off."

"But I-"

"Mr. President?" Came Leo's voice from the other end of the office. "We're late, let's go."

"Leo!" Jed exclaimed.

"What?"

"Abbey just walked out mad... I can't-"

"You should have thought about that before you let your heart rule your head, let's go." Leo answered him.

Jed sighed... He was screwed on so many levels... 

~~ 

Finally, Jed managed to drag himself away from the West Wing. He made tracks to the residence, dread filling his heart.

'Stay positive,' he told himself. 'Hopefully, she's going to be sitting on the couch waiting for me... and will be willing to accept my groveling apology...'

He flung open the doors to his bedroom and his heart sunk when he saw no one in the room.

He walked over to the closet and opened the door. He leaned into the doorway when he looked on Abbey's side of the closet, his strength failing him.

All of her clothes were gone...

Every last scrape of clothing was gone from the closet...

Jed rested his head against the side of the doorway, "Oh, Abbey..." he whispered to himself.

"Yes?" came an answer as two arms wrapped themselves around his waist.

Jed jerked around and found his wife's eyes staring back up at him.


	10. For Lack Of Better Words 10

For Lack of Better Words 

by Rhiannon and AJ 

A.K.A. The Diabolically Machivellian Sisters

 

"Abbey?" Jed's voice gave away everything flying around in his head.

"Jed, I'm so sorry that I did that to you. I realize that by asking you to take a side on child labor, that I was... well, I shouldn't have done it. You were right to handle it the way you did. I'm sorry. Ever forgive me?"

"Oh Abbey..." Jed found his arms reaching out to hold his wife tightly in them, and finding the desire to never let go.

"I love you." She smiled with a tear in her eye as she rested her head into his chest.

"I thought... I thought you really left me, Abbey... where are all of your clothes?" Jed asked as he glanced over to his side of the closet. "Better yet, where are all of my clothes?"

Pulling away from his warm embrace, Abbey looked deeply in his eyes. "First, I could never leave you. I love you too much. And second, your clothes are right here, in these suitcases, along with mine." She grinned.

"Why are they in those suitcases, and not hanging up in the closet?"

"You really can be dense sometimes... but I love you all the same. They are in the suitcases, because we are taking a vacation, my love."

"We are?" Jed's voice could best be described as confused.

"Yes," Abbey began a trail of kisses leading up from his neck to his mouth. "We are." She said, just as she enveloped his mouth with hers.

"Where are we going?" Jed asked as the strong passionate kiss came to an end.

"It's a surprise." She laughed in a way sure to light Jed's fire.

Advancing on her, until he had her backed up to a wall, Jed fiercely kissed his wife. When it ended, Jed breathlessly asked, "What did I ever do to deserve you?"

"I'm still trying to figure out what I did to deserve you." Abbey said, slipping his tie off of him.

"So... when do we leave for our vacation?"

"After this..." Abbey smiled through a very tender kiss. When it was over, she took his hand in hers and led him to their bed. Pushing him down she repeated herself. "After this..."

THE END


End file.
